


Playthings

by tea_petty



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Anal Sex, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Insecurity, Penis In Vagina Sex, Sex Toys, Smut, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:10:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26340133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tea_petty/pseuds/tea_petty
Summary: Kiku and his long time friend find an old toy.
Relationships: Japan (Hetalia)/Reader
Comments: 1
Kudos: 36





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted to my tumblr; tea-pettiest

It wasn’t a rare occurrence for Kiku to stop by her house in the evenings on his way home from work. 

Really, it would’ve been weirder if he hadn’t now, considering the time-honored tradition had been conceived in their childhood when they’d became friends, and had aged with them through primary school, high school, and even university.

It only made sense that they finished their days the way they’d always finished them; together, with a meal and maybe a drink or two, depending on the day they’d had.

For her, this ritual was sacred, and as the years passed, she found herself getting increasingly worried as societal norms dictated the chances of Kiku meeting someone and getting married, higher and higher, which would undoubtedly put an end to their long history of evening dish sessions and sake. 

While of course, society deemed her own odds increasing as well, she knew herself well enough to be certain that so long as her longtime friend remained unwed, she would be too; the result of a childhood promise that had blossomed into feelings far grander than she or her poor, heart could contain.

She wouldn’t think of that today though – at least not now when she was waiting for Hina to come and pick up her daughter, whom she watched on occasion. 

Kiku was due over at about the same time, and so at the present moment, there was far too much to do, and far too many people to be content with to worry about something as hypothetical and daunting as marriage.

“Sakura,” she called. “Have you picked up all your toys? Mama’s going to be here soon.”

She was in the kitchen, while the little girl in question was in the living room, probably sprawled before a stack of coloring books. She heard an answering giggle that signaled to her babysitter that she should come over and mediate the clean-up situation. 

She sighed, wiping her hands on the dishtowel, hanging it on the oven handle before heading to the living room to do exactly that.

As predicted, crayons littered the area, as did some crumpled up pages from the coloring book.

“You don’t want to leave your crayons behind."

Sakura just clapped her hands, another bubbly laugh sounding from her.

The doorbell rang as she was setting a juice box before Sakura, her coloring supplies packed up neatly beside her. 

_She_ went to the door in a hurry, not wanting to keep Hina or Kiku waiting, whoever it was.

Her heart leaped and her skin warmed when it was in fact, her long-time friend. 

Like most days, he’d come straight from work so he was still in his office clothes. His face, which had held the closed-off quality of someone tired, lit up when he saw her.

“Kiku,” she smiled, trying to reign in the surge in her mood – she’d known him far too long to let any of that excitement show through. “Come in.”

His slippers were right next to where she left hers before she went out. 

Like he had a thousand times before, Kiku slipped his shoes off and donned his slippers in the foyer.

She wasn’t the only one excited to see Kiku; Sakura squealed, pushing off of her chair and running over to wrap her arms securely around Kiku’s legs.

“Kiku-chan!”

She couldn’t help the smile on her face as she watched them. Kiku bent down to rumple her hair affectionately.

“Sakura-chan, did you have a good time today?”

“I did! We went to the park and colored and ate snacks!”

Kiku chuckled.

“That sounds like a good day.”

Sakura looked up at him determinedly and stretched her arms up, her fingers flexing towards him.

Kiku, never one to deny Sakura anything, scooped her up into his arms, one arm behind her knees so she could rest on the perch of his elbow, as the other hand supported her back.

“What are _you_ going to do with her?”

Kiku put on a thoughtful face; an exaggeration of how he usually looked when he was deep in thought, which she’d come to find, was often.

“Hm. We’ll probably do similar things – maybe eat dinner too.”

“And color?”

“Maybe.”

Sakura's babysitter laughed.

“And play?”

Kiku looked to his friend for confirmation.

“What do you think? Should we play?”

She nodded, matching Kiku’s feigned seriousness.

“Playing was definitely a part of _my_ evening plans.”

Kiku turned back to Sakura, clearly satisfied with the answer he’d gotten. 

“See? I’m going to have fun too, just like you did.”

Sakura continued to stare at Kiku, her eyes shining, widened to dinner-plate proportions.

“Are you going to talk?”

At this, her caretaker froze. An innocuous statement on its own, Kiku wouldn’t immediately recognize it for what it was – a reference to a particular conversation Sakura had had with her today.

Kiku chuckled, thinking the question to be more childish naivete.

“Yes, we’ll talk lots.”

Sakura looked over to her caretaker and confirmed her worst fears; she _was_ referencing the conversation they had earlier. The little girl looked back at Kiku.

“You’ll talk like we do?”

“Yes,” Kiku said. “But I might not be as good at it as you are.” He added just to see her smile.

“Will she answer your question?”

There it was. The caretaker made a sheepish expression that Kiku caught. He raised his eyebrows questioningly.

“Ah – my question?”

“She didn’t answer mine. She said I had to ask mama.”

“And what question would that be?”

“Where do babies come from?” Sakura piped up enthusiastically.

Kiku’s face froze as if his body had to reallocate all available brain functions towards figuring out a smart answer to the question. Slowly but surely though, it became more and more apparent; the various hints of tension at his face as he struggled not to laugh or blush or do anything that might make Sakura think the question was interesting enough to bring to _yochien_.

“Ah- well, you see…” she tried to reason with the little girl in Kiku’s stead, but much like him, she couldn’t scrounge up a satisfactory answer. She and Kiku’s eyes met, both willing for one to bail the other out.

Sakura looked curious, oblivious to her role in the conversational minefield.

Just then the doorbell rang. Kiku looked visibly relieved, his body sagging with the breath he’d been holding. 

She went hurriedly to the door meanwhile as Kiku set Sakura down. 

At the sight of her mother, Sakura beelined straight for the door, her arms outstretched.

“Mama! Mama!”

Sakura’s mother crooned to her, scooping her up into her arms. Sort of like Kiku, she was still in her work clothes, and she looked a little tired. Sakura seemed to erase such traces of fatigue like a miracle cure as soon as she’d fallen into Hina’s arms.

She thought that maybe the secret to youth wasn’t some mythical fountain or an intricate beauty routine, but maybe the youth themselves. She knew that chasing after the children she took care of certainly kept her active and feeling young.

“How was she?” Hina asked as she went to go and fetch Sakura’s bag from the kitchen.

“Wonderful as always, though, ah – you might have an interesting conversation waiting for you when you get home.”

Hina grimaced.

“Oh no, is she asking about babies again? I was hoping we’d gotten that settled after out bedtime story last night.” She shot her daughter an affectionate glare. “Anyway, thank you so much for watching her. We’ll see you again next week?”

The caretaker smiled warmly at Hina. “Of course, same time as always.” Hina turned to leave and then Sakura was waving a pudgy hand at Kiku and her.

The door shut and immediately the atmosphere changed. She sighed, a little tired, and headed back to the kitchen. 

Kiku, already falling into their routine, had already pulled a takeout menu from her drawer.

He looked up when she entered the kitchen again, watching as she leaned heavily against the counter. Kiku chuckled, noting how the past twenty minutes seemed to have aged her.

“You didn’t really give her an answer - Hina will have a lot of fun with _that_ question, I’ll bet.”

She blushed a little and made a face in the hopes that her expression would disguise it.

“Yeah. _That_.”

It was strange; now that it was just them, even stepping a toe near the subject of sex felt weirdly intimate – even if she’d known Kiku as long as she had. 

Truthfully, they’d never spoken of such things. Never about romance or love or any other such matters that would’ve put him and the dreams she had about him so dangerously close.

Another part of her had no desire to look under that stone; what would she do if she did and found out that Kiku _was_ dating someone? The same fear hovered at the back of every evening that they passed together – there would come a time when he’d have to skip, right? 

The nights would dwindle away, and suddenly they’d be going days without seeing each other, and then weeks. 

Who knew, by the time wedding planning started, they might have drifted far enough apart that she didn’t even receive an invite.

The thought made her heart hurt.

She was surprised when Kiku didn’t look back at the takeout menu, instead moving to rest his elbow at the counter with his chin in his hand, studying her.

“What is it?”

Kiku paused, mapping out his sentence.

“You _do_ know how babies are made, don’t you?”

She flushed, indignant.

“Of course I do, I _am_ an adult you know,” she replied heatedly.

For him to have even suggested such a thing bumped a sore spot with her; it was like he’d grown up while she remained the same seven-year-old, scraped knees, polka dot jumpers, and all.

Now it was Kiku’s turn to be flustered. His own face pinkened and his hands came up in a haphazard sign of surrender.

“Ah, I didn’t mean to offend you. It’s just…in all the time we’ve known each other, we’ve never once talked about… _that_.”

Kiku rubbed a bit at the side of his arm - a nervous tic of his. Either that or she'd given him _cooties -_ an honest possibility considering they both suddenly seemed very much young and dumb again.

None of that now; she would not be small to him. They’d already passed their adolescence with each other and she wasn’t about to go back and backtrack the years they’d passed since.

“Talk about what exactly?”

“You know…sex, and babies…and stuff.”

She looked away, busying herself with wiping her hands on the kitchen towel again. She could still feel his eyes burning into her and she mentally kicked herself. She wasn’t normally so shy when it came to talking about sex, especially with her other friends. Then again, her other friends had never been the object of her fantasies before.

She felt her cheeks itch and heat, her heart thudding in her chest like she was running to catch a train. 

The same sort of urgency hung over her head; maybe, just a little part of her had been waiting for Kiku to ask her about such things, painful as it was. 

Maybe, just maybe, she’d wanted him to inquire about that facet of her life.

She cleared her throat, turning to face her friend once more. Though she’d just dried her hands, a clammy sweat had already started to form at her palms as she mustered all the courage she could. She felt big in her quaint kitchen all of a sudden like the whole thing was made of paper and like she might be able to knock it down with one strong breath.

“We’ve known each other for so long. There are so many things that you know about me,” she paused. “There is, however…another side that you haven’t seen of me.”

They locked eyes. She wished there was a way to search their depths, if not so she could find what she needed so that he could see her up close – study her as more as a friend, to know that her skin was silk and that with her lips and heart, they made the greatest dowry anyone might receive.

Her words were a barb to his own ignorance of the desire that had been pounding away inside of her for years. This did not go unnoticed by him; he was quiet as he mulled it over, take out all but forgotten now.

The silence set fire to every nerve inside of her; with every second that slipped by, she thought she might’ve been too forward; that maybe, even the silhouette of such a side looked like monsters in the dark to him, and that his first instinct would be to drive them away and shut them out.

When his voice finally shattered the pregnant quiet though, she jolted – both from what he said and the fact that he said anything at all.

“I want to see it, this side of yours.”

At first, she didn’t fully realize what he meant when he said this. 

She didn’t let herself, because it was the one thing she’d wanted for so long and the very same thing she’d convinced herself that she would never have if only to protect her fragile heart. 

And really, wasn’t this out of the blue? Could such feverish encounters really stem from what had started out as a simple conversation? She couldn’t help but wonder, that if he truly meant what she thought he meant, if such things had been pressing at the back of his mind since before he’d found himself in her kitchen that evening – she wasn’t so naïve as to trust that posit so readily either though.

She hesitated in her response, another dismissal at the tip of her tongue, locked and loaded, though his response had been the one thing she hadn’t prepared herself for.

Kiku smiled at her, and for a moment, it felt like things were as they usually were once more. She took one look at him and her insides seemed to liquify. 

Sensing her doubt, Kiku’s expression softened further and he stepped towards her, one hand catching at her forearm.

“I could never dislike any part of you.”

The moment his fingers made contact with her, it was like lightning forked in her veins. She stiffened and her mouth went dry. Touch was something they were mostly comfortable with – but this was different. 

It felt too deliberate, too lingering, too charged, to be the usual brush of a hand or linking of arms.

She was enthralled with the turn the evening had taken, but she was completely dumbstruck as to where they should go from here.

“I, ah--, well-“ she scrambled for words she didn’t have yet, feeling herself warm further with every nonstarter.

“We could start at the bedroom,” he said gently. “I haven’t been up there in a while.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted to my tumblr; tea-pettiest

It was the most forward thing he’d said to her so far, only thinly veiled by the comfort their history together should’ve brought. 

“Yes, the bedroom.”

She would let herself play dumb to her own conscience for now; she would imagine herself naïve, as she led him to her bedroom, and pretended that it was a routine thing for them, even though he was seldom in there if not to take care of her when she was sick.

She kept her mind empty the entire way there, though she couldn’t ignore how acutely aware she was of the wetness in her panties or how sensitive her breasts felt, just begging to be touched.

They entered the room, Kiku stepping further in to look around. Fragments of her were scattered in every scratch in the wood furniture and fiber in the furnishings if one knew where to look – which Kiku did. One might consider him an expert at _her_ -watching.

She didn’t bother turning on the lights as Kiku looked around; the room still had a warm, dying glow thanks to the dusk that was falling outside, like a pile of cooling embers. It was only slightly too dim to keep polite company, and since she strongly suspected they’d be getting up to less polite things, she didn’t think she needed to turn them on.

Her arms came up to wrap loosely around herself; she was a little cold.

She was hyperaware of how Kiku studied the pictures on the walls, and the slight disarray of use she’d left the room in; her desk chair was out slightly, a notebook she’d been writing a grocery list in earlier still laying open, waiting for her to finish it. Her pajamas were in a pile at the foot of her bed and her nightstand drawer was slightly agape. Kiku had seen it (and her) in plenty worse a state, but still, she couldn’t help but feel like she was pressed under the lens of a magnifying glass.

What about when he looked at her; would he see her affection for him as slightly used, had she left her emotions in disarray?

She felt agonizingly naked.

Apprehension welled fresh in her chest, rising in her throat like dense, suffocating seawater. Really, she had no business taking him here, no business showing him anything other than the reliable friend he’d kept for so long. This was a mistake.

She turned to him suddenly.

“I- This is-, we-“

The words wouldn’t come out. Her body wouldn’t let her deny what it had craved so ardently, not when she was this close to getting it.

Kiku had reached up to loosen his tie. She swallowed at seeing the knot nestled loosely against the column of his throat, his shirt collar slightly rumpled.

“You look tense. You should get comfortable; this is your home.”

There was an unspoken part of that sentence that she heard louder than the rest; _and it’s me_. 

“I am comfortable,” she responded, a little too hasty.

For the first time, possibly since she’d met him, she found herself scared with Kiku. She was floundering as they crossed out of the comfortable, and into this new frontier.

Now, when she looked at her best friend, she almost thought she was looking at a stranger.

This wasn’t completely untrue; as lovers, they might as well have been strangers.

Kiku paused, his hand still at his tie, watching her.

“Then, you’re a bit overdressed.”

His voice was gentle, but his words were unyielding. Her nerves left her slow in acting on his remark, but truthfully, her blouse and skirt had felt stifling for some time now.

One hand reached up to finger lightly at her buttons. She undid one, hesitated, and then undid another. Kiku was watching her intently the entire time, his eyes following the path her fingers took, taking the buttons like steppingstones.

She felt like she was performing an autopsy on herself as she did so, the rise and fall of her chest only growing more obvious as her shirt parted in the wake of her movements.

When she was finished it hung around her, non-committal in its coverage.

Her frilly bra was visible underneath, and she wrapped her arms around herself again, even colder now with the exposure.

Meanwhile, something had caught Kiku’s eye by her bed; the nightstand drawer.

She thought little of this until Kiku peered in, the contents holding his attention longer than anything else in her room – including her, for that matter, partially undressed.

That’s when realization and dread hit her in what would’ve been convenient if it had been a fatal hit.

“Wait!” she gasped, making a lunge for the drawer as Kiku pulled it out further, reaching in to procure a rather girthy vibrator.

She reached the nightstand too late, and to make matters worse, she was painfully close to the man holding her sex toy. She froze, though inside, fire licked at her skin. 

She thought she might blackout. She hoped, at least.

“I wouldn’t have thought you liked things like this,” he mused. “Was the drawer open because you used it recently?”

She didn’t know how to answer; she felt that if she lied, he’d know right away. 

She tried anyway.

“No!”

Kiku made a disbelieving noise at the back of his throat.

Much to her horror, Kiku turned it around in his hands, looking it over, studying the ribbed surface and the settings by the buttons on the end. He wasn’t judging – just intrigued. It certainly didn’t look like it was supposed to simulate a real cock; not in size at least. 

“Put it back,” she begged, her voice small in her mortification.

“But I’d like to use it on you.”

Her face warmed further and she felt herself clench emptily, the wetness in her panties getting worse. Her arms folded around herself, her frame cowering into the limited coverage her shirt still offered.

“You should finish undressing,” he said when she didn’t move again.

He tossed the vibrator down on her bed and reached for her, tugging her arms away from her chest. He gave her a moment once she yielded to him, not wanting to rush her, before he gently pushed her shirt over her shoulders, smoothing the fabric down her arms, letting it fall to the floor. He paused, gauging her reaction. She raised her chin to look at him.

There was nothing for one to read of the other than their own desperate curiosity reflected back.

Kiku moved slowly, reaching for her skirt now. He gave it a quick tug over her hips before letting it pool around her feet. She didn’t step out of it right away.

Her panties underneath were a lacy, light pink and he couldn’t help but smile at this.

“Your underwear is cute.”

She looked away. 

“You’ve seen my underwear before.”

He reached a hand up to lift her face so that she had to look at him. His hand was tender, despite how firm he was. 

His skin was soft and when she saw his face, she was surprised to see that his expression was too.

“That’s true, but I’ve never seen you _in_ it. It’s cute,” his thumb stroked across her cheek, stirring up the butterflies in her stomach. “You’re really cute.”

The compliment had more heat simmering in her. Again, her arms came up to wrap around herself, though she couldn’t decide if it was to keep his scrutiny out, or his compliment in.

Her gaze dropped, but she couldn’t withdraw entirely, not when he was still holding her face like that. When his other hand came up to cup at her jaw, her eyes snapped to his face again.

She was surprised to see a slightly pink riding at his own cheeks; he was blushing too. 

He was close enough now that she could count his eyelashes. If her anxieties hadn’t immobilized her, she would’ve reached up to touch him and trace that soft skin of his, to run her fingers along his full lips.

He leaned in closer to her, and her heart rate sped up; she recognized it as something that had appeared in her fantasies many times – the preface to their kiss.

Her breathing roughened already, her brow pulling into a slight furrow.

She wanted to fall forward and close the distance between the two of them, but God, she didn’t know if she could.

Kiku’s breath fanned across her lips, and she felt hers twitch, ready, impatient even, for his mouth on hers. 

His eyes fell shut and he kissed her, his lips meeting hers to pave the way for his arms to wrap more substantially around her, holding her gently to him. His arms were everything she’d dreamed of and more; the firmness of him as anchoring as she’d yearned for it to be. His lips were soft, not only in their movements but in their texture. Her imagination did the feel of him against her no justice at all.

She reached up, too lost in the kiss to be caught up in the way his very presence seemed to make her heart stop and her fears about filling his arms as wholly as she wanted to. Her fingers closed around the lapels of his suit jacket, the fabric rubbing against her skin as she cinched his body to hers. 

There was something to be said about the eroticism of feeling the difference in their states of dress, but she couldn’t quite find the words for it.

She had to work hard to keep her mind blank before, but now, she couldn’t keep a coherent thought in if she’d wanted to.

Kiku broke the kiss in a way that made her feel how difficult it was for him to tear himself away. His nose nudged up against hers, the push of it against her making it seem like he was being pulled back – perhaps by the last scrap of his self-control.

They were still nose to nose when he opened his eyes again. His hands came up to cup her face, this time, not to hold her to him so much as to revere her, to thank her for what she’d just given him. 

While her mind felt buoyant and too far to reach, his was here on earth, reeling with a million thoughts a second. All the things that had built up in his heart pressed against his skin from the inside, as if he might truly burst if he didn’t get all of the words out; every time he’d felt like he’d wanted to grab her and kiss her like this, the brilliance she’d streaked across his life, how he’d always seemed to look beside him to find her there – through every moment, every milestone.

She was as constant as the sun rising and setting each day, maybe more so, taking into account those times when they’d slept in so long that they’d missed it entirely, before meeting up for a late-evening breakfast to nurse their terrible hangovers.

She’d always seemed to know what to say to him, but Kiku was not as great with words, and he knew this. He had all of these great things he’d wanted to tell her, but his clumsy tongue marred and disfigured all of these beautiful, incandescent feelings.

He hocked falling so deeply in love he might drown in it, and his heart had compensated him with a ninety-nine cent Hallmark compliment.

“You’re so pretty,” he murmured against her.

She flushed.

Kiku eased himself onto the edge of the bed, taking her with him. The toy was just behind him. 

He kissed her again, and this time, instead of the deliberate, languid movements intended to savor, he seemed to be making up for lost time.

He kissed her fervently, long enough to make her skin ignite and for her to curl inward against him again before he kissed over her jaw. 

She gasped at the sudden shift in mood and again found herself in Kiku’s arms. 

He pulled her tight against him, arching his body as he trapped her to him. 

Her head fell back and he wasted no time in ducking his face into her neck, trailing open-mouthed kisses over her sensitive skin.

She moaned against him, her fingers seizing and wrinkling the fabric of his shirt. He was radiating heat through his clothes, and she wanted desperately to peel them back to glean the fire beneath.

His lips moved down, down, down, his tongue finding the dip of her collarbone, his lips seeking the soft skin just above her breasts. Her chest seemed to heave the nearer he drew to her heart. 

Her hands reached up, catching in his soft, black hair, the slip of it making it difficult to find a hold on him that would really _hold_ him.

His mouth broke away from her, the tip of his nose trailing a line over the swell of one breast, just above where one of the cups of her bra started.

“ _Please_ , can I take it off?” His voice was strained, his breathing hard.

Her chest rose and fell steeply and she watched him with a glassy stare. 

She couldn’t answer; too busy playing with the idea of pushing her chest forward and having his face dip further into her cleavage.

Kiku reached up with one hand and hooked his finger around one of her bra straps, watching her as he dragged it over her shoulder. She didn’t stop him. He repeated this on the other strap, and she shifted closer to him.

Gently, Kiku reached for the cups and dragged it down in one swift movement. 

She let her eyes fall shut, her cheeks flaring. Kiku smoothed his hands up, starting at her waist, inching up over her belly and ribs. 

He paused for a breath when his hands were just beneath her breasts, thumbs fitted at the valley between before he continued upwards to palm them fully. 

Immediately, she found herself arching towards him with a breathy moan.

Kiku gave the weighty swells of her breasts a squeeze, fondling gently. 

He muttered something under his breath, quick like a hummingbird. At the back of her mind, she noted that it was in his native tongue. 

She peeked an eye open and caught him staring at her.

“I said, ‘they’re perfect.’”

She felt her heart stutter in her chest and she pinched her eyes shut again, lifting her hand so that she could cover her eyes with her wrist. She felt Kiku lower his mouth to her once more, and continue kissing. One of his hands reached around to her back where the clasp of her bra was, and in what struck her as surprisingly little time, the pressure released from around her and Kiku was tossing her bra away.

His mouth was gentle against her; she felt him nuzzle against a breast before he kissed her as softly as he had on her mouth. Every so often, he’d give a little suck at her sensitive skin that had her writhing against him. Without thinking, her leg rode upon his, and then his hands were slipping down to grab her butt, hoisting her up onto his lap, putting him at the perfect vantage to bury his face in her breasts.

She let out a yelp, her heart pounding as she scrabbled for a hold at his shoulders. One arm wrapped around her waist, securing her to him and forcing her body into an arch.

“It’s okay, I won’t drop you.”

She felt her heart swell at this; of course, he wouldn’t. He’d never let her down before.

Kiku mouthed at a breast, feeling the weighty bounce of her against him before he craned his neck to kiss softly at the nipple.

She whimpered at seeing how tenderly he handled her. Was that their history or his heart?

One of his hands snaked down between them, finding the junction between her thighs. She felt something soft stroke against the soaked-through crotch of her panties and she shuddered against him, her fingers pinching into the meat of his shoulders.

Kiku grunted beneath her.

He stroked again, more persistently, and she writhed in his grip.

He listened to the stifled groan as it buzzed in her chest and he chuckled, feeling his cock twitch at how she helpless she seemed to be in his arms.

“You’re quite wet.”

No sooner had he said that, he felt a tension around his hand – her thighs trying to squeeze shut around him.

“Don’t say stuff like _that_.”

He swallowed more of the delight that rose in him at her shyness; it was so _her_ , to be this endearingly vulnerable during sex.

“You don’t need to be embarrassed about it; it makes me happy to know that you…want me.”

She had little time to wonder at his pause.

“I want you too,” he continued. 

Come to think of it, she hadn’t even bothered to look for his own signs of arousal and from where Kiku was holding her now, his crotch wasn’t in her line of sight.

“It’s-“ her voice broke as he took a nipple in his mouth and sucked gently, lavishing his tongue against her. “ _Ah_ , it’s harder for me to tell…that you want me.”

He smiled against her.

“That’s my bad – then maybe you should undress me, so it’s easier to see.”

He let her down some so that she was resting firmly on his lap, one hand anchored at her hip so that she could use her hands for things other than holding onto him while the hand at her sex remained there, stroking slowly. He watched her face twitch as he brushed her clit through the fabric of her panties. Her breath caught when he focused on that spot.

“Do you need help?”

His question was baiting and through the fog of her arousal, she managed to shoot him a glare before her hands went to his shoulders to push his jacket off. 

He helped her shuck the garment off, slipping one arm from a sleeve and then the other. 

Next, was the tie, already started for her. She loosened the knot further, and when the loop was wide enough to fit over his head, she lifted it, careful not to catch at his ears or muss his hair in the process.

She found his eyes as this happened, and both of them softened.

Despite the naughtier implications of removing the garment, the gesture itself was tender. Kiku hoped she’d do it over and over again.

His shirt took longer with all those damned buttons. Kiku’s fingers at her sex slowed, trying to make it easier for her to undo them without his help.

Slowly but surely his shirt parted where her fingers passed and she was humbled. God, was he _handsome_.

He had lovely skin – always had, smooth and soft to the touch. Years of judo had carved out the firm play of muscle along his torso, lean and taut like whipcord.

She paused with his shirt hanging from his frame, the buttons undone so she could splay her hands against the planes of his chest. She touched him shyly, reverently. A pang went through Kiku’s chest and he placed his hand over one of hers, guiding it over to where she could feel the steady throb of his heart.

Neither of them said anything, they didn’t want to shatter the moment.

She leaned in, and Kiku held absolutely still, not wanting to scare her off, his heart almost stilling entirely so that she could do whatever it is she wanted to do – he’d take it and be grateful that she was in his arms in the first place.

Her hands smoothed up to grasp at his shoulders and she pressed her mouth to his in a soft kiss. For a moment, Kiku forgot that they were supposed to be fucking; this kiss was everything to him – the first kiss _she_ gave to _him_.

Then she was pressing her tongue tentatively against his bottom lip, wanting to move forward but not wanting to take more liberties than what he would grant her. Little did she know, he would’ve given her whatever she wanted.

Kiku shrugged his shirt off impatiently before his arms wrapped tightly around her, his lips parting.

She slipped her tongue into his mouth and Kiku moaned, his mouth closing only enough to catch her and give a playful suck. Her hands shook and she rolled her hips unwittingly against him, grinding up against his erection. Kiku made a strangled sound at the back of his throat, and then his fingers were dipping into her underwear as her hands went for his belt, fumbling with how he somehow garnered command of the kiss once more.

When his lips moved, hers echoed their response, eager to please him, because doing so would please her all the more.

His fingers found her wet folds and as soon as he started rubbing her, collecting the wetness that dewed at his fingers, she shuddered to a stop, a moan buzzing at her mouth.

Kiku let out a breathy, little laugh at this, withdrawing only enough to help her with his belt. She flushed but wasn’t so schooled that she kept her hips still, desperate as she was for contact. She ground against him again, rutting in a way that had his cock twitching. 

Her need for him was as arousing as the scent of her, which was starting to grow stronger as the clothes came off.

The clang of his belt buckle sounded as he hastily pulled the leather through the belt loops on his trousers. Then her hands were at the zip of him, undoing his pants. He scarcely had time to lift his hips as she shimmied off of him to tug his pants down his legs. They dropped to the floor and he kicked them off. 

She caught herself before climbing onto his lap; with only his briefs, his erection was much more prominent.

With all that had happened, she’d forgotten that much of this had been catalyzed by him finding the toy. Kiku had not forgotten though, and now that he saw how wet and tantalizingly bare she was for him, the notion to use the vibrator on her returned with a vengeance.

“Could you sit on my lap?”

It was a question but both knew this late in the game, she was powerless to say no.

She went to him obediently, turning so that her ass faced him. His fingers folded over her hipbones, dragging her back to him, pulling her onto his lap. 

She shifted a little uncomfortably.

“ _Ah_ , am I too heavy? I-“

His arms held her tighter, wrapping fully around her belly and squeezing. Like this, she could feel his erection pressed against her lower back. He buried his face into the crook of her neck.

She felt like she was consumed by him; it was heavenly.

“No, but you’re still overdressed.”

He reached for the sides of her panties and hooked his thumbs into the waistband. 

“Will you let me see it then? The side of you that’s dizzy from pleasure?”

Her face warmed. 

She looked down, watching as he dragged her panties down her legs, lifting her hips so he could get the garment past her hips. 

She felt safe from this vantage point, nestled against his chest. Kiku seemed to feel the quiet comfort that had settled between them too. Her panties dropped, forgotten, to the floor and he wrapped his arms around her once more to fold her into a brief hug, pressing a kiss to the shell of her ear.

“Spread your legs for me,” he murmured.

He reached for the curls between her legs, his middle finger pressing in to collect some of her slick. Her breathing hitched and he pressed in further, rubbing little circles, spreading the wetness. She squirmed against him, and one of his hands went to hook around a thigh, holding her spread for him as he probed the wet seam of her cunt for her entrance.

She was terribly slick, practically dripping, really. 

All the same, Kiku went slowly as he eased his finger in. He paid rapt attention to her body against his, trying to feel for the faintest sign of pain. He found none, even after having hilted his middle finger into her to the knuckle. 

Her walls surrounded him like a wet hug. 

His cock throbbed at the thought.

Kiku pulled his finger out, pairing it with his index finger and then working both of them in. It was a tighter fit, but still, she took him rather easily. His fingers dragged a wet sound from her, and once again hilted, he gave an experimental pump.

She moaned loudly and Kikku felt her tense against him. He peered down at her body, spread before him, through the valley of her breasts as her hips twitched, jerking upwards to meet his hand.

It was satisfying to watch as she tried to rut against his hand.

She let out another hapless mewl as he gave her another pump before pulling out entirely. His fingers shined, coated with her slick.

“You make such good sounds.”

She tossed her head away so that she wasn’t looking at him, but Kiku didn’t need to see her face to tell that she was blushing.

He reached for the toy, still where he’d tossed it at the beginning of their encounter. He hadn’t studied the settings extensively, but he knew he wanted to see her come.

He clicked the button three times in a row, the buzz picking up in intensity after each subsequent press of the button.

When it rattled his grasp he moved to hold it to her, not immediately pushing it inside of her, instead just holding it against her folds.

She bucked her hips again.

“ _Oh_!-“

Kiku started tracing the tip of the vibrator delicately along her slit. She was quivering in his arms.

“Ah,” she whined. “ _Kiku_!”

He could’ve died happily hearing her call to him like that. Kiku reached around to grasp a breast, his thumb teasing at her nipple as he continued the easy back and forth motion of the toy. 

He was moving like a radar, searching for a specific spot; he knew he found it when she jolted viciously in his arms as if electrocuted.

“ _Ah_!” She gasped, her chest heaving. 

Satisfied, Kiku pressed the vibrator more insistently at the spot.

“It’s too-“ her hands batted at him, trying to push it away but she was powerless; the very object she was trying to get rid of having already sapped her of her strength to fight it.

He felt her twitch in his arms, once, then twice. He wasn’t trying to finish this early; he withdrew the toy before she could reach a third one, and then repositioned it at her entrance.

He pressed in, slower than he had with his fingers because the vibrator was that much thicker. Despite this, once he’d eased it in an inch or so, it slipped in easily – she never complained once.

The sound of the buzz was muted by her tight walls, but its effects only seemed to intensify the deeper he pushed it in. She shook in his arms, another moan dropping from her lips. She squirmed, turning her face towards his chest, and her hands reached down, finding Kiku’s legs. Her grip pinched into him as he began thrusting the toy into her.

“Ah, it’s so…”

More wet sounds came from the drag of the toy inside of her.

“Do you like that?”

He thrust the toy in a little faster, already knowing the answer. She was trembling on top of him, and he couldn’t tell if it was from the vibrations wracking her frame, or because she was already hurtling towards her release.

He could feel her thighs quivering in his grasp, and that’s when Kiku decided, a little reluctantly, to do away with the toy. 

He started to pull it back out, and when it didn’t pump back in, her eyes snapped open and she twisted in his arms to look at him.

He knew the question already poised at the tip of her tongue.

“You can’t come too early,” he explained.

She sure would’ve liked to. The emptiness had left her arousal pounding more vehemently than before, leaving her slick chilled and stagnating, spattered against the insides of her thighs.

“ _Please_ put it back in,” one hand stroked at his chest and Kiku twitched beneath her. “ _Please_.”

Her hand curled delicately against his chest and he thought for a moment that she was honest to God, batting her eyelashes at him.

Under normal circumstances, it would’ve been easy for him not to buckle under such pressure, but here, when she was naked in his lap, when she was _looking_ at him like that, _begging_ -

It was close, but no; the first time he watched her come had to be while he was inside of her.

She had wrapped her arms around herself again, cold and wanting. A pang went through his chest. If he could’ve done it, he would’ve fulfilled her every need then and there, made it so she never wanted for a thing again. Isn’t that what you did when you shared a life with someone? Came together to make each other whole?

He tossed the toy aside again, not bothering to turn it off; it vibrated mutely into her thick duvet.

He tried to shimmy his underwear off without disturbing her too much.

Feeling the resistance of the garment between them, she lifted herself enough so that he could peel his briefs down, kicking them down and off his legs.

“Turn around,” he grunted.

She only had time to do exactly that before he was yanking her down onto his lap.

The contact of his bared cock seared against her stomach.

From her hips, his hands smoothed upwards, gliding over her torso, palming her breasts and letting them drop from his grasp in a luscious bounce.

One hand continued up to stroke along the side of her face, before guiding her face towards his own. She was at kissing distance, though the time for kissing had passed. He craved a union of a new kind now.

She was at the mercy of his eyes, warm, dark, thoughtful. His gaze dropped down her body before flicking back up to her face.

Again, he lapsed into his native tongue, and her eyes fluttered shut. 

“So beautiful,” he then said.

She blushed again, leaning into his touch.

Kiku’s grip crept up around her hip once more, guiding her forward, easing her weight over his erection.

Their mingled heat had Kiku clenching his jaw, a tendon leaping out.

She stifled the urge to lean in and kiss it, instead rolling her hips against him.

When she lifted her hips, she’d left a wet spot on his cock, which sprang up without her weight against it. She moved, lining it up with her entrance. She looked at Kiku then and marveled for a moment; they’d crossed oceans together in one evening.

“Is this okay?” she asked.

The corner of Kiku’s mouth quirked up.

“It’s much better than okay.”

The rise and fall of his chest were discernible, near hypnotizing to her. 

She focused on that as she let her hips drop, allowing gravity to help sheathe him in her heat.

She moaned as soon as his friction started burning through her. It was almost spiritual like she was being baptized in fire, only the fire was inside of her.

“That good already?” His voice was tight. “I just saw you take something bigger.”

Her cheeks burned, but it was nothing to how he burned her. 

“But now I’m…taking _you_.”

He fit her easily, but she didn’t want easy; she wanted give and take until there was so much given and so much taken that they were all mixed up and she had no idea where she ended and he began.

She wasted no time; when she felt his steadying warmth beneath her, she lifted her hips up and let them drop again, rinse and repeat, pumping herself on his length like a piston. 

Kiku’s arms came up around her, warm when she was already headfirst in a fever pitch. She bounced on him, and the wet sounds came again, this time accompanied by the audible slap of her ass against his hips. 

The reach of his cock inside of her made her feel new again; it felt virginal though their habits weren’t – he hadn’t touched that part of her before, and now it was all his.

She leaned in, her movements rendering the kiss she pressed to him sloppy, but he loved it all the same. When he bucked up into her, their kisses grew even more tumultuous, knocking teeth, bruising lips with more lips. It was sublime.

His hands came up, stroking at her breasts, brushing over her nipples. 

She sighed, contented despite how she forged ahead in search of her release. His hands dropped to her waist and held her as tightly as he dared to without inhibiting her relentless pace.

He groaned, his cock twitching inside of her. His face ducked forward, planting into her soft breasts. Her momentum made her body rock against him. Kiku didn’t lift his face; just opened his mouth and kissed where his position would allow, peppering soft, haphazard kisses at her chest and neck.

His breath at her feverish skin was the man beneath her fanning the flames. 

Her stomach flip-flopped; her skin washed hot and cold beneath the cover of the muggy sweat she was sporting.

She let herself drop down on Kiku and threw her head back, needing more than anything to lean into her release.

He grabbed her then, suddenly, his hands anchoring at her hips and holding her still. Her eyes snapped open and her head came up, surprised. Kiku barely noticed, he was already thrusting up into her in rapid-fire.

His hips surged upwards, bucking against her with a force that might’ve had her falling off if he hadn’t been holding her so tightly.

“ _Ah_! Kiku-“

His face went red and she could barely make out the low curse he’d let out under his breath as his cock plunged into her. At this she felt herself clench; Kiku seldom cursed.

Kiku felt this; she was close.

She clenched again once more, and then a few more times in a harried sequence; her body echoing his rabbity pace back to him.

The tension in her unfurled suddenly, radiating out in her body, making her twitch in his arms. She clutched him close, her grip on him tightening, her eyes pinching shut.

“ _Kiku_ , I’m-“

Her voice broke off into a loud keen.

She curled into him, one hand slipping from its sweaty grasp at his shoulder to press at her mouth; too little too late in stifling such a noise.

Kiku wanted to hear more of those sounds though. He kept thrusting into her, working her through her orgasm. 

His pace had slowed in favor of more focused, rougher thrusts – he wanted to get her to make that noise again, to call his name like _that_.

His cock twitched inside of her again. He was certain if she’d begged him to, he would’ve been able to come right then and there.

Kiku looked at her, her cheek now resting against her shoulder, clinging to him like it might save her life. Her skin shined with sweat and her hair was delightfully mussed, save for a few strands that were plastered to her temple and cheek. Kiku reached over to brush them back and noticed how she turned her face towards him as he did so, her eyes still shut, as if the instinct to find him, to trust him, was a natural one.

His heart throbbed; he couldn’t believe he’d woken up today and thought it was going to be just like any other.

He could feel when her body had started to wind down from her climax; the pulsating of her sex had ceased, and the area where their hips met was sticky with a new wetness. Her body had stilled, it seemed, save for the thud of her heart against his chest.

Kiku was still rock hard.

“Can you…get on your hands and knees?”

It took her a moment to move, seeing as she had to remember how to move her limbs. She didn’t bother asking about the sudden position change though. With her own needs sated, she wanted nothing more than to be the cause of his satisfaction.

She crawled off of his lap and assumed the position. Her arms shook slightly, still fatigued from how she’d come.

At the sound of her nightstand drawer again, she looked over her shoulder, curious as to what Kiku was planning. She only saw him behind her again though, his hands fidgeting with something she couldn’t see.

“Kiku? What-“

Kiku looked like he was rubbing at something, and for a moment, she thought he might be jerking off.

Then something cold dripped onto her ass. 

She squeaked, stiffening at the chill of lubricant.

“Ah, I’m sorry, I tried to warm it in my hands first.”

Kiku’s slick fingers massaged at each buttock, fondling, and drawing increasingly near to the cleft of her ass. His fingers rubbed in between, and again she felt her stomach flip.

It had been a while since she’d taken it there.

Kiku’s fingers slowed at the pucker of her asshole.

“Is this…okay?” 

She was struck by the hesitance in his voice; the first time she’d heard it that evening. 

“Can I put it here?”

His finger ghosted over the entrance and she shuddered, a twinge of heat flecking up her spine.

The idea of having had him inside of her twice excited her. She pushed back, grinding her ass against his stiff cock.

“ _Please_ put it in.”

Her words were pleading but her voice was not; the wink was in her tone since Kiku couldn’t see her face.

A few moments later, she felt his engorged tip press against her hole; his cock was slick too, both from having just been inside of her and because of the generous amount of lube he’d used to prep in the meantime. 

She spread for him and sighed. The burn of the stretch was almost a welcome sting, her body relenting easily to him as he entered her from behind, mercifully void of tension thanks to her earlier orgasm.

This entrance wasn't as easy; he could see her fingers clenching at her bedspread as a bead of sweat slipped between her shoulder blades. 

If anything, he was ready to succumb to her tightness. He hadn’t been so far from his own release himself, and she was even tighter here than in her cunt. His own thighs gave a little warning tremble, his grip on her hips, pinching tight.

“Do you…do this often?”

He had meant to say; _have you done this before_? Desire clouded his mind though and surfaced some of the conversational awkwardness he often tried to hide. 

Again, she looked over her shoulder, this time, shooting him a sharp look.

“I don’t – not that it’s anyone’s business.”

She sounded indignant. Kiku was juggling the pursuit of his pleasure and making amends for his faux-pas as he hilted into her from behind.

“Of course, I’m sorry.”

Kiku sounded strained and she almost felt bad for her sharp retort.

“I’ve done it before though,” she offered. “And liked it.”

When he was inside of her this deep, she could feel his torso behind her. 

“I especially like that you’re doing it to me.”

This came out softer; a confession wrapped in the language of sex because that was still preferable to baring her heart to him.

Kiku started thrusting, this time, at a much slower pace than he’d taken with her other hole. Here, he seemed focused on depth, and she twitched, still sensitive from her last orgasm.

Her sex clenched, empty, the contrasting fullness of him buried in her ass, adding to the dull arousal stirring in her. She could feel his balls slapping lightly against her clit as he thrust into her.

“You’re so _tight.”_

She squeezed around him for good measure and felt him twitch inside of her. 

She wondered how close he was.

The tip of him brushed a spot, sensitive on its own, but a certain weakness after all she’d been through that evening. She cried out and squeezed again, this time without intending to.

Kiku reached around to grasp a breast from behind, using it as leverage to thrust a little faster. She leaned backward, pushing against him to meet the impact of his body. 

She could feel the slap of his hips more substantially now and groaned. She almost wished she had a mirror in her room so she could watch.

His hand squeezed at her breast, the way she was poised lending to making them fuller.

Amid Kiku’s rough breathing, she heard him force another curse between his teeth. More than anything, she wished she could’ve been facing him then, watching to see the effect her body had on him.

Kiku managed to pump himself into her a few more times before his cock gave another vicious twitch.

“ _Ah_ -“

His voice caught in his throat, silencing his moan no sooner had it started. 

Kiku hilted inside of her one last time, and then she felt the pleasant warmth of his spend inside of her. 

It was enough for her to let out a breathy little gasp of her own.

His body sagged around hers, his skin damp with sweat against her back. 

His hand was still at her breast, fondling idly.

“I’m sorry – I didn’t even ask if-“ Kiku started when he caught his breath, though his cheeks burned and he broke off when he had to mention finishing.

She ground herself gently against his softening cock, and twin moans hung in the air.

“I like when-“ she swallowed, her natural shyness tripping her up, though they were way past that. “I like it when my partners…come inside.”

Still, Kiku didn’t linger long. He pulled out and she was almost disappointed at the departing drag of him against her. She could feel his spend slipping out of her asshole, dripping downwards to the backs of her thighs.

She was about to get off of her knees when she felt something that shocked her into staying still. Soft, wet, and lapping gently at her asshole, cleaning his cooling spatter.

She angled her head to try and get a glimpse of what Kiku was doing behind her.

Kiku could sense her tensing.

“Hold still,” he murmured into her.

She was torn; on one hand, the soft lap of his tongue at her sensitive, slick regions was intoxicatingly, deliriously good. On the other hand, she couldn’t shake the thought of how it must taste or smell. She cringed away from him, leaning back to sit where he couldn’t reach the sloppy glaze of them at her ass, but his hand came between her legs to stop her.

“Ng – wait, it’s _messy_ and-“

“Mm, it is.”

She tried to squirm away from him but Kiku gripped her thighs open and continued to clean her with his mouth. Her asshole was finished within a few moments, and then Kiku was rolling onto his back and sliding in between her legs, craning his neck so that he could reach her sex.

He pressed a soft, open-mouthed kiss against her folds, his tongue pushing in to swipe against her and she moaned, her arms trembling.

“ _Oh_ -“ 

Kiku chuckled, and she felt the vibrations buzz against her cunt. Her face burned; he really did always take care of her. 

She ached to be in his arms again, resting, with his soft, clean scent by her, and the lull of his breath at her ear.

Her thighs trembled – something that didn’t go unnoticed by Kiku.

“Relax,” he said, his hands pressing at her thighs, trying to force her weight down on him.

“No, wait, I’ll be too heavy and-“

Before she could finish, her legs buckled, too fatigued to resist the call of his mouth and the pull of his hands. 

Her sex lowered to his face and she felt him nuzzle into it, his lips moving, his tongue tracing along her slit. 

His tongue brushed up against her clit and she couldn’t help but jolt against him, grinding unwittingly against his face.

Her breath caught as her arousal started to pound in her again and Kiku felt it from where he was nestled against her. She couldn’t help rolling her hips against him, feeling the way his nose and chin brushed against her sensitive folds as his tongue and lips rubbed sweet friction near her entrance and at her clit.

She couldn’t even remember what it felt like to be anything other than soaked, by now.

Kiku was in love with the weight of her on him and the gentle crush of her thighs. Under her, there was only her scent and softness, her musky wetness, where the only place to go was further inside of her.

His grip was iron around her, holding her to him despite how she squirmed and writhed over him. 

He could tell she was close again when she twitched against him in the same haphazard way she’d clenched around him earlier. He had just finished cleaning her, he thought, amused, and here she was, about to make a mess again.

Finding her clit again, Kiku pressed his tongue to it, sucking at her folds. The sensitive bundle of nerves felt the gentle suction of his mouth, and she came then, her slick seeping out onto his face.

He never stopped lapping as she came, desperate to catch as much as her release as possible. He kept his ministrations up until she was flinching away from him, too sensitive for how he ravished her sex from below.

Only then did he let his grip relax at her legs and allow her to clamber off of him.

Kiku took a moment to catch his breath, and then he was pushing himself into an upright position, dragging his wrist across his mouth to wipe some of her slick from him.

When he looked at her, her arms were around herself, legs tucked against her. 

He noticed that she was shaking a little, and her nipples looked hard like bullets.

The cool of the now dark room was starting to hit him too now that the fever of sex was subsiding. He pulled the blanket back and coaxed her under it. As he drew the blanket up around her, he wrapped his arms loosely around her. She was watching him back now with something peculiar in her eyes. 

Kiku was deciding if he should stay or go – he wasn't sure what was appropriate. After one night stands, he always left, but then again, that was only because the scope of their relationship only extended to the fringes of the night. Like ghouls, it would dissipate once sunlight hit it.

Here, Kiku wanted desperately to stay with this woman, who was like a home to him, and this room that was so familiar, he could recall it better than he could his bedroom from his childhood home.

What would await them when they woke up if they fell asleep in each other’s arms though? Who would his best friend be if they’d so adamantly transgressed on the boundaries of pure friendship? He hadn’t even taken her on a proper date yet. He had no idea if she even _wanted_ one.

She looked afraid as to what he was deciding. He felt like he was holding a loaded gun.

He deliberated for a few moments. Then, he peeled the covers back further and climbed in. His heart was vaulting in his chest; she was watching him, studying how he settled into the sleepy, intimate warmth.

Here he was beneath her sheets, his naked form pressing to hers, his arms coming to wrap tentatively around her.

Now that they were sated, she thought that maybe the time for kissing had come around again. She was pleased when she felt his lips at the nape of her neck, and couldn’t resist twisting in his arms to see if he might divulge such affection to her lips as well.

“This feels…right,” he admitted when she was facing him.

He was smiling slightly, his arm beneath her so she could rest her head at his bicep. It was comfortable, safe. Even if this bareness was new, when she looked into his eyes, nothing had changed all that much – nothing they couldn’t figure out together, anyway.

“It does. I’ve been waiting for this for so long.”

Her voice was a whisper like she thought that this was a dream, and was trying not to wake herself up.

He pressed a kiss to her nose, his arms tightening around her body. She let him crush her gently to his chest, where her cheek rested, drinking in the thrum of his heartbeat beneath. Her hand curled against his skin, fingers lightly spread as if she were reaching out to grab his heart.

Little did she know, it was already hers to keep.


End file.
